🌿 ISLE OF SKYE TOURIST BOARD — MAJOR ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT ANNOUNCEMENT

The Isle of Skye Tourist Board is delighted to announce plans for one of Europe’s largest medicinal cannabis production facilities on the island. We would like to stress from the outset that it is medicinal. Apparently we have to keep saying that. The proposed Skye Medicinal Horticultural & Pharmaceutical Centre will consist of 14 acres of high-security, climate-controlled glasshouses and is expected to create more than 180 jobs. A site near Broadford has been identified following an extensive search for somewhere with clean air, plentiful water and absolutely no chance whatsoever of the plants accidentally receiving too much natural sunlight. Project director Dr. James Henderson explained: “Cannabis requires carefully controlled growing conditions, including precise temperature, humidity and lighting.” Local crofter Donnie MacLeod listened carefully before asking: “So you’re building a greenhouse?” Dr Henderson explained that it was rather more sophisticated than that. Donnie: “A big greenhouse?” Negotiations continue. The facility will operate under extremely strict security, with perimeter fencing, CCTV, electronic access controls and 24-hour monitoring. Local resident Murdo MacKinnon, 78, was asked whether he had any concerns about security. “No.” Asked whether he thought anyone might attempt to break in: “Aye.” Asked why: “It’s fourteen acres of cannabis.” Fair point. The development will use renewable energy wherever possible, including wind power, heat recovery and rainwater collection. Solar panels were also proposed. The planning department has described this as “optimistic.” The company says there should be no noticeable smell outside the facility. This claim has been welcomed by residents of Broadford, although several have requested that this particular part of the environmental assessment be tested properly before anybody gets too confident. Employment opportunities will include horticulture, laboratory work, security, engineering and quality control. More than 400 people have already expressed an interest in the position of Quality Control Officer. There are currently three vacancies. The Tourist Board would like to make it absolutely clear that this is not how quality control works. A small visitor centre is also being considered, although the suggestion of a gift shop has been withdrawn following what officials described as “far too much enthusiasm.” Local businessman Angus MacLeod has already submitted plans for a café opposite. Proposed name: The Baked Potato. Planning officers have asked him to reconsider. He hasn’t. Construction could begin next year, subject to planning permission, licensing, environmental assessments and somebody explaining the whole thing properly to Donnie. He remains unconvinced. “Fourteen acres?” Yes. “All heated?” Yes. “For plants?” Yes. Long pause. “Medicinal?” Yes, Donnie. Medicinal. 🌿 ISLE OF SKYE TOURIST BOARD "Creating jobs. Supporting innovation. And, for the final time, it’s medicinal."