ISLE OF SKYE TOURIST BOARD - VISITOR GUIDE No.41

THE HIGHLAND COW The Highland cow is one of Skye’s most photographed residents. With its long fringe, impressive horns and expression of mild disapproval, it appears to have been designed specifically for visitors to stop their cars in unfortunate places. Please observe the following guidance. - PHOTOGRAPHY You are welcome to take photographs from a safe distance. There is no need to approach the cow, stroke its fringe or explain that the light would be better if it moved three feet to the left. If it declines to look at your camera, accept the photograph you have. Donnie once spent twenty minutes attempting to direct one into a better pose. The resulting image shows only Donnie moving backwards. - SELFIES The cow does not know what a selfie is and has expressed no interest in learning. Please do not approach one to establish whether you can both fit in the frame. The Tourist Board receives enough photographs of visitors with Highland cows in the background. A cow in the foreground with a visitor leaving the frame at speed is less useful to our publicity department. - PERSONAL SPACE A Highland cow may look like an exceptionally large soft toy. It is an exceptionally large cow. Give it room, especially if calves are nearby, and keep dogs under close control. Do not stand between a cow and its calf, a cow and its food, or a cow and wherever it has decided to go next. The horns are not decorative, however well they suit the photographs. - FEEDING Please do not offer biscuits, crisps or anything purchased for your own lunch. Highland cattle have their own diet and do not require a visitor to improve it. Murdo once offered one the end of his sandwich. It accepted the sandwich, the paper bag and any suggestion that Murdo was in charge of the encounter. - HAIR CARE Visitors frequently ask how Highland cattle maintain their fringes in Skye weather. The short answer is that they do not attempt to. The long answer is still being investigated by several hairdressers who have declined to approach close enough for a consultation. Please do not try to move a cow’s fringe to see its eyes. It knows where you are. - ROAD USE If cattle are on the road, slow down and give them time and space. Do not sound the horn to hurry them along. A Highland cow has never responded to a timetable, and we have little evidence that it intends to start. Should one stop directly in front of your vehicle and stare through the windscreen, remain patient. It is assessing your driving. On Skye, this is a service several residents have requested for years. - WHERE TO FIND THEM Highland cattle may be seen in fields and other suitable places. The Tourist Board cannot guarantee an appearance at a specific time, location or angle. Donnie has attempted to arrange appointments, but the cattle have not acknowledged his calendar. The Highland cow is a wonderful animal to see. Admire it, photograph it respectfully and let it carry on with its day. If it is standing in a passing place, the passing place is temporarily unavailable. Unlike most road closures, this one is clearly signposted. - ISLE OF SKYE TOURIST BOARD “On Skye, the Highland cow has right of way. She also decides when (and if) you get it back.”