ISLE OF SKYE TOURIST BOARD – VISITOR GUIDANCE No.86

"THE KILT" Visitors to Scotland may occasionally encounter a man wearing a kilt. This is perfectly normal. Remain calm. A kilt is a traditional garment made from several yards of tartan, wrapped around the waist and secured firmly enough to survive a ceilidh, a wedding and the walk home afterwards. It is commonly worn at weddings, funerals, Highland games, formal dinners, rugby matches and any occasion where a Scottish man feels trousers would suggest a lack of commitment. - IDENTIFYING A GENUINE KILT A properly fitted kilt should fall approximately to the middle of the knee. If it reaches the ankles, it is probably a tartan skirt. If it stops halfway down the thigh, it was probably purchased online shortly before a stag weekend. If it includes pockets, belt loops and a zip, it may simply be shorts going through a difficult period. The pleats should be worn at the back. This is important. A visitor who hires a kilt and wears the pleats at the front may not be corrected immediately, as local people will wish to see how far he gets. - THE SPORRAN The small pouch worn at the front is called a sporran. As the traditional kilt has no pockets, the sporran carries essential items such as money, keys, a telephone, a hip flask and the remaining dignity of the wearer. It should hang at the front, not at the side. During energetic dancing it may begin moving independently. This is expected and should not be reported. - TARTAN SELECTION Many tartans are associated with particular clans, families, districts, regiments and organisations. Visitors are welcome to wear tartan. You do not require a certificate, ancestry report or written permission from a clan chief. However, claiming direct descent from Robert the Bruce because your grandmother once changed trains in Edinburgh may invite further questions. If you are unsure which tartan to choose, select one you like. If challenged, say it belonged to your mother’s side. This usually creates enough uncertainty to end the discussion. - THE QUESTION Visitors are strongly advised not to ask: “What do you wear underneath it?” This question has been asked continuously since approximately 1746, and no new answers are expected. If you must know, the official position is: Shoes and socks. Everything beyond that remains a private matter between the wearer, the weather and whichever direction the wind is coming from. Do not attempt independent verification. - KILT SAFETY Do not lift, tug, flick or otherwise inspect a kilt. Do not ask the wearer to “give us a twirl.” Do not refer to it as a skirt unless you are entirely confident of your footing and have already identified the nearest exit. During strong Highland winds, allow the wearer additional personal space and maintain eye contact at all times. If the kilt begins to rise, look towards the scenery. This is why Scotland has so much scenery. - SITTING DOWN Sitting in a kilt requires care, confidence and an awareness of polished furniture. The pleats should be smoothed before sitting. Visitors wearing hired kilts are advised to practise this manoeuvre privately before attempting it at a wedding. Crossing the legs enthusiastically is discouraged. So is sitting opposite a low coffee table. - KILT HIRE A hired kilt outfit may include the kilt, jacket, waistcoat, shirt, tie, sporran, belt, flashes, socks and shoes. By the time everything has been fitted, adjusted and explained, the wearer will have forgotten why he objected to wearing a suit. Hire-shop staff are highly trained professionals. Listen carefully. If they tell you the kilt is not too tight, they are correct. Breathing normally is not part of the traditional silhouette. - THE SGIAN-DUBH A small ceremonial knife called a sgian-dubh may be worn tucked into the top of the sock. This is traditional Highland dress and not necessarily evidence that negotiations have failed. Do not remove it. Do not ask whether it is real. Do not attempt to carry one through airport security merely because “the Tourist Board said it was traditional.” We will deny everything. - CEILIDH CONDITIONS A kilt is particularly suited to ceilidh dancing because it allows freedom of movement, ventilation and sufficient warning to nearby furniture. During Strip the Willow, the kilt may reach speeds not anticipated by its original maker. Spectators should stand well back. Participants should remove loose change from the sporran unless they wish to distribute it evenly around the hall. - FORMAL OCCASIONS At Scottish weddings, the groom and several guests may wear kilts. By approximately 10.30pm, jackets will have been removed, ties loosened and clan rivalries temporarily replaced by arguments about who requested “Loch Lomond.” By midnight, at least one man will have misplaced his sporran. It will be returned the following morning containing two foreign coins, a raffle ticket and somebody else’s house key. - PHOTOGRAPHS Always ask permission before taking a photograph. A man wearing a kilt is not automatically part of the visitor experience. He may be attending a wedding, playing the pipes, carrying a coffin or simply trying to reach the bar before the English relatives. If permission is granted, take the photograph from the front. Low angles are unnecessary. - COMMON VISITOR ERRORS Visitors should avoid: • Wearing the kilt backwards • Fastening the sporran under one armpit • Tucking football shirts into the waistband • Asking strangers to identify every tartan • Referring to the entire outfit as “a costume” • Shouting “Freedom!” at the wearer • Purchasing a plastic claymore and becoming difficult Anyone committing more than three of these offences may be quietly returned to the gift shop. - FINAL GUIDANCE The kilt should be worn with confidence, respect and knees capable of handling the weather. When worn correctly, the kilt is dignified, impressive and deeply rooted in Scottish culture. When worn incorrectly, it can make an otherwise respectable man look as though he has lost a bet. It does not require a Scottish accent. It does not improve one. If you see a man wearing a kilt in horizontal rain, do not offer sympathy. He checked the forecast, rejected trousers and left the house anyway. The matter is between him and his knees. - ISLE OF SKYE TOURIST BOARD "In Scotland, trousers are clothing. A kilt is a decision."